June 16, 2020

Game of Thrones : I feel like I got dumped, and I'm heartbroken

By Natasha Dio

A satirical and spot on assessment of how it feels, now that it's over...

Every now and then my husband and I will be talking to each other in the house and we'll say "I did not do it" in our best Tyrion voice. We laugh, and then we sigh - sad. 

Sometimes when we're making chicken for dinner and we haven't eaten all day and we finally sit down we gruff our voices and say "I'm going to have to eat every fucking chicken in this room." It's bitter sweet. It's like Game of Thrones broke up with us, and we just can't get over it. 

For me, I lived and breathed Game of Thrones. I read all the books, I have the Fire and Blood hardcover illustrated book (I even bought it again, for my Dad.) I watched every episode at least 10 times, including all the extra nerdy commentary at the end (Seriously, Fuck YOU D.B.W + DB for copping out on the series finale. You could have at least explained how you got there. But no, you knew it was garbage and you didn't have any comments about it. A decade's worth of work, no wrap up. Classy. If you were so eager to start on Star Wars - which didn't even pan out - you should have handed over the reigns to someone that had the time and devotion this series deserved for the end.)

For a show that I used to just watch over and over and yes, OVER again (with subtitles) I now find myself in the middle of this Covid 19 pandemic, and I'd rather watch literally anything else. Too Hot to Handle? This isn't me. But here we are. You ruined me, Game of Thrones. I don't even recognize myself anymore. I find myself watching mindless garbage because I'm afraid to invest another decade of my life into another serious story I'll love (but let's face it, you were my greatest love. How can anything measure up?) only to have my heart shattered into a million pieces again. 

We could have been great together, Game of Thrones. My husband and I went to both your Orchestra events here in Denver, and man I was so bummed when we were not on the city list for the third year. The music was everything. This story moved so many people across the globe in so many different ways, but the music was hands down, what made you feel it. I will never forget the violinist playing Sansa's wedding song in a white dress that grew and grew as the platform raised, red paper leaves falling from the ceiling. And now, when I hear that music I turn it off. It makes me so sad. What could have been...

It really does feel like being broken up with. Nothing makes sense, I'm sad and angry about how it went down. Remembering the good times feels like a betrayal of myself. Even now I still can't understand why they let it end that way. And of course you've heard people retort "well if it's so easy to do it right, how would you do it?"

I'm glad you asked....

Few things -

Bran is the freaking Night King

and you cannot convince me otherwise.

Why do I think this? Aside from the obvious Great Other that is mentioned - Bran and the Night King are the only 2 people in all of Westerosi history and beyond to have the ability to worg into people, albeit dead or alive. 

The Night King can sense Bran through the crows he's worging into.

They literally look alike. Do a side by side comparison. 

Jojen warns him if you worg too long you'll forget where your body is, your home. forget everyone and everything.

Also, the bloodraven tells him "stay too long beneath the sea and you'll drown." and he is visibly upset when Bran calls out to Ned in the memory at the Tower of Joy. He know's that Bran will become the Night King again. As has been happening in a time loop. 

ALSO ALSO - Melisandre describes the Night King's Champion as being a boy sitting under a tree's roots in the darkness, with a wolf face. The blood raven even tells him not to fear the darkness, it is your friend. Well, the lord of light says otherwise, man. The night is dark and full of terrors... it is known.

Bloodraven is also Bran

Stay with me, okay? This is what I think happened - in a timeline - Bran finds the bloodraven or as the show calls - three eyed raven (think: past present and future) so The Three Eyed Raven in the Tree is Bran from the original timeline, ages have passed. He's stuck in the tree, he and the tree are one. This is because he stayed too long beneath the sea (a metaphor for staying in the past) and ended up also becoming the original Night King. 

So in the books, Old Nan thinks that all the Brandon Starks throughout history could be the same Brandon Stark. So what if it is - Bran goes back in time to try to stop the Night King by building the Wall, and Winterfell, and Storms End as Bran the Builder. But he realizes that none of those efforts ever stop the Night King from winning. So he goes back further, and he sees the Night King being formed by the children of the forest who are gagging him. He then feels a shiver down his spine, and they're also sitting in the same exact way slumped against the tree. And we never go any further back than that. Interesting. 

Then there's the whole bit about the Night King touching Bran and having his tracking capabilities. And The Three Eyed Raven tells Bran it is now time for you to become me, and you are not ready. 

So let's just say this happened - instead of Bran doing nothing during the battle of Winterfell, let's say instead he is at Storms End after Winterfell has already fallen. Yeah, thats a huge chunk of the North, I know. But it would have made it so much more high stakes if half the Kingdom had fallen to the Night King rather than anticlimactically ending in one night. Anyway, Storms End has a huge wall surrounding it that has been enchanted with spells by the children of the forest and Bran the Builder. So when all hope has been lost, and the walls are being melted down by the Ice Dragon, Bran goes back in time one last time to see if he can stop the Night King from being created. 

He goes back, and worgs into the man that's seen tied to a tree (similar to how he worged into Hodor in the past, and done fucked him up for life) only when he worgs into this man he tries to reason with the children of the forest and they GAG him so he can't speak anymore. This would then be the reason Bran feels a chill when he views the memory of the Night King being created via first person. Since he was worging, and since he's the only person in history to ever worg into another human, the magic of the children of the forest kills a piece of Bran and traps him in the Night King forever. He becomes the Night King. And when he does, he gets stuck to the Tree forever in this timeline. And then as he watches the timelines go by and by (because he's still conscious in the tree, by proxy his mind inside the night king and his body) he becomes the Three Eyed Raven too. Past Present, and Future. He's lured Bran here a few times, ever notice all the skulls at the base of the tree? To whom do they belong? 

He's been waiting for Brandon Stark - he beckoned to him via the crows that made Bran climb the abandoned tower in the beginning that lead to him being thrown from the window by Jaime Lannister. The Three Eyed Raven is the one that sets Bran on the journey. All to see if he can guide his younger different timeline self into making the right decision, don't meddle with the past - "the ink is already dry". I bet he went back and made the Mad King MAD by whispering to him. Why else show us that in a flash of vision via Bran's perspective?? Anyway, Present Bran fails - like always, because it's a time loop, only he fails much earlier on which is why The Three Eyed Raven tells him he's not ready to become him. 

So anyway, Jon will eventually figure out that they are connected - and he will have to kill the Night King (as we've been building up to for 10 years) Arya will have to be the one who kills Bran - It's poetic in that Bran gifts Arya the dagger, and now she uses it to kill him, and the Night King since The Three Eyed Raven is already dead. (Past, Present, Future). They all must die. 

Storms End will hold true, Bran will die there, and so will the Night King. The castle where the Storm quite literally ends

Jon Still Kills Daenerys

At Storms End, Jaime Lannister decides to head back to King's Landing to reason with Ceresi to send help. She refuses, and he kills her - like we've all been waiting for, little brother. Jaime returns with all the troops to help out Storms End but they are all killed and added to the Night King's Army.

When all hope is lost, Samwell discovers the prophecy about Azor Ahai. Melisandre explains that Azor Ahai had to kill the woman he loved for the sword to be real, true, and effectively light bringer. She explains why Stannis could not have been Azor Ahai.

Daenerys declares that since Jon died for his people, she can too. This is to help quell her insecurity about Jon having a better claim to the throne. That all this insane journey of hers has lead to her death to save her people. Melisandre says she can try to bring her back, but there are no promises. Daenerys is adamant about it. Jon kills her, his sword grows aflame, and he goes out to ride the last remaining dragon to kill the Night King. When he returns both triumphant and devastated that Bran is gone, he finds they were not able to bring her back. He demands they try again, one last time. Drogon swoops in and picks up her dead body. Then he flies all the way past Valyria. To the land of Asshai. He passes beneath the shadow, and brings her body down to a red priestess we've seen in other seasons. 

Fast forward 8 months and Daenerys gives birth - to twins. In childbirth, Danaerys dies, afterall the dragon only has 3 heads. Jon has been in the North because he didn't want to rule, and he effectively killed his Queen, the woman he loves. One day, he finds two dragon eggs. Drogon has laid them (one for each of his kids). Sounds right, Jon Snow - knows nothing. Didn't know his Mother nor his Father, and won't know his kids either. 

Sansa can still have the North. But it's after she and the Hound share an intimate moment. Tyrion is King. Gendry doesn't want Storms End. Arya and Gendry swoop out on a ship, because he will follow her anywhere, and she loves telling him what to do. Eventually, they reach the land of Asshai - where they encounter tales of the silver haired Queen who rose from the dead to birth a two headed dragon. 


The end. 

An end I can live with at least. 


Why do you need a master of whispers Bran? 🙄